Hello again! I'm happy to report that I feel like I'm finally getting some mojo in the classroom! This week was very short, considering we didn't have school Monday (not sure why) or Wednesday (snow day), but it was a good one! I needed a win after last week and after feeling like a total failure, and this week was exactly what I needed. I learned check multiple websites for school alerts... I got all the way to school Wednesday before I found out we had a snow day. Oops! I wasn't the only one either. Note to self: check LOTS of sources, not just two!
I spent the weekend in Oshkosh, which was a huge refresher after last week. It was so great to reconnect with friends and feel like I still have some kind of social life. Tuesday I worked on staying strong when Women's choir tries to throw me off my game. We worked on the same piece that broke me down, and again they challenged me with a slew of questions and some defiance, but I stood my ground. There was one girl that kept asking questions to challenge me, and I finally just ignored her and kept moving. She finally shouted, "Ms. Robertson! Don't you see my hand in the air?! I have a question!" I calmly smiled and said, "I'm not taking questions right now," and went back to my rehearsal. She grumbled amongst her classmates, but my rehearsal was not derailed. I was so proud! Though I was happy with the triumph of the block, Men's choir the following block had its own challenges. My pacing was terrible, and I got tripped up in my directions a few times, but the guys are pretty easy to please, so I don't think it they thought much of it (thank God!).
Wednesday, I spent my snow day relaxing. I had a much needed mental health day. I watched some TV, read a book, took a bath... It was exactly what I needed. I have just been feeling so stressed the past few weeks with little release time that it was nice to feel like I was all planned and could take a deep breath.
Thursday I focused on my pacing. I think I need to put a little clock by the piano to help because I can't always see the one on the wall. My pacing was a lot better when I was focused on it. I was with Women's and Men's choir again, and it made my classroom management a lot better. I even got to work on new parts of pieces in Women's choir. Men's choir seemed to appreciate my attention to pacing, though they were very chatty by the end of class. In their defense, it wasn't all their fault. During my warm up, a 6'2" 15 year old blew up on Erica because she asked him to stop goofing around during warm ups. The entire class's attention was diverted to this student, and he was escorted out of the room. After that, it was pretty hard to get their attention, but they tried their best to stay focused. The second half of rehearsal, the student who blew up returned to class and continued to distract those around him. After he returned, it was nearly impossible to wrangle them back into rehearsal mode. I ended up getting short with a few of them at the end of class because after I excused them to write in their logs for the day and wait for the bell, a few just walked out the door. I have never shouted at them before, but I definitely raised my voice to get them back in the room. They listened, but I regretted raising my voice. I feel like I have a really good rapport with Men's choir, so I hope it doesn't affect that.
Today (Friday) was my favorite day. I got to see Treble and Concert choirs, which is always fun, despite the fact that Concert was the squirreliest I have ever seen them. They are just groups that are looking to please you and will try anything you ask. It was nice considering I hadn't seen them since last Friday. We also had a Black Heritage assembly, which was my favorite part of the day. It was so cool to see the students perform spoken word poetry, rap, dance, and sing. There was a group of students who did an interpretive dance to a worship song that was about giving your life to Christ. I was so happy with the message they were conveying, but I couldn't help but wonder how it got approved... Oh well! At the end of the assembly, they had a long line of African American students line the stage and one by one come up to the microphone and bust a myth about their culture. For example, one girl walked up and said, "Just because I am loud and don't use proper English doesn't mean I'm ghetto. The ghetto is a place, not an attitude." A young female student walked up and said, "Just because I'm black doesn't mean I'm going to be pregnant before I graduate." The entire auditorium erupted with applause. I realized in that moment that these kids are bombarded with these ignorant assumptions every day, and honestly, I think if you would have asked me in high school, I would have thought a lot of these statements were true and not just stereotypes. It made me sad to know how ignorant I was and that ignorance such as mine is still out there, but I was so proud of these students for conveying such a positive message about their culture to their peers. I nearly teared up! Coolest thing I've seen so far at school.
Today I found out that one of my students in my Music Appreciation class will most likely be kicked out of school for something he did last week. He was the student who was very defiant toward female teachers, but I had felt like I had made a lot of progress with him. I'm really upset about it, and I worry about his well being. If he really does get kicked out, he will more than likely just be shipped off to another school where his issues will continue. Please be praying for him and prepare those who are about to work with him. He is in what my cooperating teacher calls "the dance of the lemons."
Next week, I'm continuing full rehearsals (90 min). I can't believe I only have 3 weeks left at my first placement. This has gone by so fast! I'm going to a job fair tomorrow, so please pray that I will get some leads if not an early contract to work in MPS. It could be a great day! Thanks for your prayers, and I'll see you next week!
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